it seems like the last week i have been a bit on a downward spiral. i don't really know why, but i think i have been comparing myself to others a little too much. i try not to do this because it never ends up good, but apparently my thoughts have got the best of me. anyway, i am deciding right now to stop. i am going to try to change my thinking. i am taking a stress management class and i think if i were to take it seriously and do some of the things it talks about i might really be able to change things. i think i have been personalizing things a little too much. like, if i text someone to hang out or something and they text back a one word answer or nothing at all, i am really taking it personally. that's one of the things about technology that i hate. you never know what is really going on or what tone people are talking in. (right now my tone is practical, not irrational). does anyone else ever feel lonely being home a lot? brad is even home right now, but i find myself yearning for female company. for a best friend. one that i can call anytime without an excuse. i have a friend like that, she just lives a million miles away. so that makes it harder and we don't talk as much as we used to. we just aren't in each others daily life anymore. there are a few other things that are adding to my moods of sad, but i never know how much of that personal stuff i can write here. i want to be honest, but not air out all of my dirty laundry online. anyway, there is my life, for this little minute.
on the upside, my kids are the freaking cutest ever. jovi does this little thing where she wrinkles her nose and kind of snortily breathes in... it just cracks me up. and reese, my sweet little reese, his latest is to tell me that he wants to do things for "five minutes" or "three minutes" or that i weigh "twenty-six ounces" numbers are all over the place and he knows all about them. ha! just writing about it makes me feel happy. those two little cuties sure are sweet. tell me to not be selfish and think about stupid things. tell me not to look on facebook all the time. or instagram to see how sweet everyone else's lives are. it just doesn't matter. mine is good, really amazing actually, sometimes i just forget for a minute.